normal?

It is funny, I think, when you get an autism diagnosis. A person tends to lose perspective on the "normal" things in life. For example, sibling rivalry. Do the boys argue with each other about everything because they are brothers two years apart or is it more than that? Sam can string along lots of good days and then bam...the shit hits the fan. Anything and everything is a problem. I don't know anymore what is real. The thinking part of his brain is ALWAYS working. He takes our conversations and twists them just so.

Here is one...

S: Would you be sad if I died?
Me: Of course I would be. You are my heart and I can't even begin to think of my world without you in it.

Same conversation, weeks later and when he is angry...

Me: Sam, when we get home, you will need to go into your room and take a break. (After smacking his brother and slamming the car door so he couldn't climb into the car).
S: I hope I die when you are still alive so you will be sad and cry.

Okay does this need a response? I am speechless after one of these zingers and I don't know what to say. I know what I feel though. Helpless and oh so very sad. My heart aches when I hear these things. I know I should be able to detach from his words and just help him but I just can't sometimes. I worry that he does know what he is saying, and is trying to hurt me. My gosh though, he is only 6! What is he going to have to say when he is 16?